stop an act. The will of man overrides all other motions, as this is an intense
and compelling force or power to act voluntarily. Therefore, your will enable you
to initiate, sustain and stop an act, depending on what you have decided to do,
which ends up in an action being taken, either to the positive or to the negative.
There are several myths and misconceptions about masturbation. The most
popular is that only men masturbates, no this is not true, as both men and
women in all age groups engage in this activity.
When this act becomes an obsession, and gives you cause for concern, then you
are in the process of getting out of the habit. Studies have shown that 95% of
men and 85.1% of females masturbates, with a higher prevalence amongst
teens.
Steps to take to stop this unhealthy habit.
The responses that flooded in with regards to my last article on masturbation
have shown that;
1. people, named and with a face , are engaged in this act.
2. it cuts across both male and female
3. some due to loneliness, and others to derive sexual pleasure, so as not to
fall in premarital sex.
4. imbalance in libido, between spouses
5. many are concerned that it has become an addiction, and desperately want
to get out of it.
The first step is to acknowledge that it is now an addiction.
Do not feel let down, and look down on yourself. That you are now a failure; and
assume that it is a sign of your engaging in a pattern of activity that is self-
destructive.
Feeling let down is different from hating yourself, which means condemning your
total being. When you feel let down in yourself, you are upset with a certain part
of your life. So do not get into self hatred, as this will not allow you to take the
right step, in solving your problem. So be positive in self let down, with a focus
on taking a step towards your stopping this habit.
Anyone who stops addictive behaviour and returns to it will feel let down. Give
yourself the credit for what you have accomplished in acknowledging that there is
a problem, and you want to stop it. If you fail and return to it several times, still
give credit to yourself.
Secondly, find someone you respect and confide in, and would be accountable
to, that can help you. Talk it over with this person, and any time there is an urge
to do it, remember that you need to be in control.
This act is actually in the mind. It is your inquisitive and wondering thought, that
has brought you this far and you must exercise control over your thoughts, and
take charge, say no, and hold on! The burning urge would soon pass.
Keep busy doing other things. If you get the urge at all times, it is easier to get
busy doing all other things, from work, to school, business and housekeeping.
Do not be idle. Take a walk, get out of the house, just do not be alone, go and
get along with friend, find hubbies, hang out or get a job.
Find other things to occupy your mind and your time. If you find yourself in bed
and the urge comes, take a book and read, watch a clean movie, news, musical,
or better still use your talent at this time!
It is important that you keep busy mentally and physically. This urge can come
on like a temptation, and make up your mind that it will not have you. This can
also be done by stopping slowly, and try not to be alone at all times, so that you
will not have the urge to do it. When you are in the bathroom, do not look at
yourself naked and do not stay there too long. This decision must be made by
you.
Studies have shown that it takes about two weeks to break a habit. Get rid of all
pornographic materials with you. Find a way to be physically active as an outlet.
When you do this, do not feel guilty, but proud that you are able to overcome it,
and worthy enough to accomplish whatever you want.
When your desire to stop, is greater that your desire to continue, then your goal
is achieved. Get to the root of your desire and then take charge. It will take a
lot of will power.
Start enforcing the behaviour you “want” to happen, and stop doing the bad
activity. If you are a religious person, get help from your local church, someone
who would be your accountability partner, to help you, and pray with you, keep
busy. Reward yourself any time you triumph. The more you triumph, the more it
becomes, and most importantly, pray to God like mad, to help you stop it, he
created you, and knows the best for you.
Remember, when you get bored, call a friend to change your mood and think
about something else, and listen to music.
Masturbation is a selfish self pleasure that only hurt yourself. The mind is
powerful, do not underestimate it. Stay active and keep praying. Exercise a lot,
do not think about sex. God created you, and your body is the temple of God,
therefore ask Him for help, and He will answer you, if you are sincere.
Sexual addiction, is just like all other addiction, is very powerful, and takes a
deliberate and concerted effort and determination to stop it.
A change in environment has been found to be next to a determination to stop
this act. It is easy for an individual to alter their external environment quite
easily. What you see, most of the time, influences your thought, which is a very
important factor here.
The more silent, less visible masturbation addiction affects millions of women
around the world. Young boys may begin to play with themselves and
experiment over puberty, young girls start at the onset of menstruation. Girls
mature faster than boys and often face tempting fantasies at an earlier age.
Successful treatment for this addiction would require a committed individual who
is not afraid but inspired for some dramatic changes. And these would involve
changes in personal choices, relationship choices and accessory limitations. This
could be easy or difficult, but in all, will be worthwhile.
How does this habit happen?
In males, this happens usually between the ages 14 to 16yrs. Females progress
more rapidly and start between ages 12 and 15years. The reason many people
have masturbated during their life time is because of external, emotional and
body’s natural attraction to pleasure.
Recovery from this addiction would require a sustained driven effort and the
objective can be achieved by abstinence.
In conclusion, there is a need for you to acknowledge you have a problem, then
make a determined effort as listed above to stop this habit, and mainly along
side with abstinence. Yes, you can do without masturbating. You initiated it, and
your will, would also enable you to get out of this habit.
My interaction with our readers, have shown that it cuts through both sexes, male
and female, teens, young adults and mature adults.
For the teens, it is important you seek help from a mature confidant after you
have made up your mind, that there is an addiction and you want to stop it.
Parents should please look for signs of this habit early in their children, and help
them. Also for the mature singles, the same applies to you, and seek
professional help as well, with reference to married man and woman involved in
this act, please talk to your spouse about this problem. Join hands to resolve
this problem, and ensure that you satisfy each other sexually at all times.
Source : skytrends
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